Thursday, September 1, 2011

The Trifecta- Give Me Your Tired, Your Poor, Your One-Liners Edition

Greetings, race fans! Time once again for the Trifecta. This week sees all three NASCAR series in action as well as IndyCar.

But first, the Beagle needs your help. Our church's puppet ministry is doing a show September 11. One of our acts is a Carnac the Magnificent type routine called The Great Paulini. Paulini (who is in 5th grade) needs new jokes (Hanny already provided us with several good ones via Facebook). Paulini's sidekick is an 8' anaconda puppet who goes into violent convulsions at the mere mention of Adam & Eve, the Garden of Eden, apples, or St. Patrick (paging Dr. Valus). So this week- along with your driver picks- hit me with your best question and answer type jokes- NO POLITICS PLEASE .

Example: The answer is Joan of Arc. The question is "What was the name of Noah's wife?"

Now back to business:

This week's lineup(along with last week's final points):
Dwindy 8
SB 18
jon 20
moseby 20
tez 22
Hanny 24
CR 27
kristen 36

This week's races:

1.) The NASCAR Camping World Truck Series race from Atlanta, Friday September 2; green flag drops at 8:19pm ET (entry list)

2.) The NASCAR Nationwide Series race from Atlanta, Saturday September 3; green flag drops at 7:46pm ET (entry list)

3.) The IndyCar Baltimore Grand Prix, Sunday September 4; green flag drops at 2:45pm ET.

4.) The NASCAR Sprint Cup Series race from Atlanta, Sunday September 4; green flag drops at 7:46pm ET.

There you have it.


  1. Trucks--Clint Bowyer

    NNS--Kevin Harvick


  2. The Beagle is going with

    Trucks- Kyle

    Cup- Bad Brad wins the million

    Indy- Will Power

  3. Hey SB!

    Hope everyone's well on this September Fools Day!

    Here we go...

    CWTS - James Buescher From Plano Texas!
    NWS - Ricky Stenhouse Jr. from Olive Branch Mississippi!
    Cup - Dale Earnhardt Jr. from Kannapolis North Carolina!

    There ya go!

    Thanks SB!

  4. Snake jokes?

    Snake Joke 1
    There where two snakes talking. The 1st one said Sidney, are we the type of snakes who wrap ourselves around our prey and squeeze and crush until they re dead? Or are we the type of snake who ambush our prey and bite them and they are poisioned? . Then the second Snake says “Why do you ask?” The 1st one replies: “I just bit my lip!”

    Snake Joke 2
    A old snake goes to see his Doctor. “Doc, I need something for my eyes…can’t see well these days”. The Doc fixes him up with a pair of glasses and tells him to return in 2 weeks. The snake comes back in 2 weeks and tells the doctor he’s very depressed. Doc says, “What’s the problem…didn’t the glasses help you?” “The glasses are fine doc, I just discovered I’ve been living with a water hose the past 2 years!”

    Goto for a whole bunch more...

  5. CR here,

    Trucks- Kyle
    Cup- Kurt Busch
    IndyCar- Will Power

    Sorry, can't think of a clean joke at the moment! lol

  6. Trucks.... KYLE!

    NNS....... Kez

    Cup ...... Kahne

  7. I can tell you the worst joke I've heard, will that do?

    Trucks - Clint Bowyer
    NW - Kyle Busch
    Indycar - Dario Franchitti

  8. Hmmm. gotta think of jokes for ya - my grandma is always telling me them (over and over! Ya think I'd recall them!)

    Trucks - Flyin Ryan Newman
    NW - Cupcake McMurray
    Cup - Mr Roboto Kenseth

  9. What kind of lettuce did they serve on the Titanic? Iceburg

    What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

    Why do geese fly south every year? Because its too far to walk

    Bad enough!?!?!?!?

  10. Kristen-

    Love the lettuce joke. Hanny sent me the boomerang joke a few weeks ago.

    Any thoughts on our apple-phobic snake??? We have found a puppet that looks exactly like Dr. Phil.

  11. NNS - Kyle
    Cup - JJ
    IRL - Will Power

  12. A: IHOP

    Q: Where did the one-legged waitress work?

  13. What did one casket say to the other casket?

    Is that you coffin?

  14. If Bev was playing, she'd be leading now since Horney won.

  15. What do you get if you cross a snake with a hotdog? A fangfurther.

  16. What did the naughty little diamondback say to his big sister?
    "Don't be such a rattle-tail!"

  17. From "Racing With Rich" (Richard Allen) on Twitter...

    You know what the difference is between the Big 12 Conference and the Titanic?

    They couldn't get people to leave the Titanic...

  18. LOL Dwindy not sure the 5th graders will get that one... not sure I got it. LOL

  19. Off to the coast for the weekend. Hope you all have a great one!

  20. After everyone has completed one race:

    jon 2
    moseby 2
    tez 2
    SB 3
    Hanny 3
    CR 3
    kristen 5
    Dwindy 10

  21. With everyone having completed two races:

    moseby 3
    SB 4
    tez 4
    CR 4
    jon 6
    Hanny 10
    Dwindy 13
    kristen 26

    Tez has finished his race schedule for the weekend and is anxiously awaiting the results of the Cup race tonight. Looks to be an exciting one- if not there in Atlanta, at least it will be here at the Trifecta.

    Jon- sent you a message on FB. You will need to change your Cup driver if you want to go for the win. You and moseby both have JJ.

  22. Jon (via Facebook) is dropping JJ in the Cup race and going with Harvick instead.

    Looks like Tez is going to have a long wait to see if anyone beats his 8 points(Dario finished 4th in the IndyCar race).

    Be back Tuesday :o(

  23. Actually, SB, I'm dropping Harvick for Clint Bowyer. Bowyer is desperate not only for a strong run, but a win. I think he's going to run up front--he's got a stout car.

  24. I'm back from the Oregon coast. The best damn marriage of land and ocean in the world!

    Now, that I've fulfilled my duty to my state's tourism promotional activities... I was just catching up on what I missed in the race world this weekend, and just saw the video of the safety truck fiasco in Baltimore. Will Power must have had one of those WTF moments!

    I'm tempted to change my driver to my fav, Flying Ryan in tomorrow's race. But, I guess I'll stick with his old teammate, Kurt Busch.

  25. AMS... Lap 94...

    Dale Jr. running one lap down in 28th... "I ain't running this sh*t again next time,"

    "I'll make a note of it," replies Letarte.

  26. Tez here: Yeley and Cassill...right, who had those two in their picks?

  27. Tez again, nicked this from Jay on yahoo: JJ Yeley reporting over the radio that he's very very scared because he can't see any cars in front of him. "Did everybody go to Richmond already?"

  28. ok, we have a final. That sound you keep hearing is jon kicking himself for dropping Harvick in favor of Bowyer.

    The final standings:

    moseby 5
    tez 8
    CR 8
    SB 10
    Dwindy 32
    kristen 35
    jon 42
    Hanny 44

    Congrats to moseby on his 2nd win of the season.

  29. CR say's CONGRATS to MOSEBY!

  30. and Tez copies SB and CR's sentiments of congrats to moseby :)

  31. Congrats to Moseby. Having said that, *and I'm just sayin'* IF two people pick the same driver, and both are in contention for the win, the person that picked that driver first should be allowed to keep his or her pick, and the driver that picked second should have the option of keeping or changing the pick.