Daytona Beach Hilton, Conference Room
President, Fox Sports: Okay guys, the Shootout, er, Unlimited ratings were not good…
Grizzled Fox NASCAR Producer: Danica wasn't in it!
Pres.: Oh, okay that explains it. I guess we can stick with what we've used for the last twelve years?
GFNP: Sure. If it’s not broken, don’t fix it. What do we have this year, people?
Mike Joy: Well, I’ll continue being DW’s straight man, while scanning twitter for any usable tidbits.
Fresh Faced Production Assistant: I could search twitter for you, Mr. Joy.
Joy: No thanks, kid. I have plenty of time up in the booth.
GFNP: Nice. What else?
Larry McReynolds: I’ll mention Dale Sr., Davey Allison, and me winning the Daytona 500 about ten to fifteen times during the broadcast, whether it’s pertinent to what’s actually occurring on the track, or not.
GFNP: Perfect. All our new viewers need to know that, every year. How about you, Champ?
Darrell Waltrip: I’ll start with three or four predictions during pre-race. Whether they actually happen or not doesn't matter. I’ll just keep selling at least one of them as if it is happening. Probably throw in a forty year old song and maybe an I Love Lucy or Laugh-In reference.
Teen-Age Intern: My great-great-great Nana loved I Love Lucy.
Fresh Faced Production Assistant: How about a cartoon rodent to try and hook some younger customers?
A bolt of lightning strikes the Hilton, blowing out the windows and creating a huge inferno